Tubershuckle

A lonely male Tubershuckle

This is a lonely male Tubershuckle. Right now he is very confused and unsure why you are staring at him. Normally, he wanders the forest floor in search of delicious morsels or other Tubershuckles with which he could strike up a conversation. Perhaps if we back away a little bit we will be able to see him in action.

A lonely male Tubershuckle leaping onto a delicious morsel to feed

Indeed, he has located a tasty morsel. This is usually cause for excitement, as you can see - he leaps in the air and lands upside-down with his funnel-like "head" completely covering the morsel. Fortunately, being upside down is hardly a disadvantage when your eyes are at the end of long, bendy straws. He will, however, lower his guard a bit as he savors the moment.

A Tubershuckle savoring its dinner

Meeting a female Tubershuckle is another very exciting moment in a young male's life. He must first impress her with his sucking power, which she assesses herself via what appears to us a big, sloppy kiss. He must demonstrate his strength, but there is a balance to be reached - if he gets overly excited, he may end up swallowing her whole. Evolutionary pressures have struck a delicate balance among the Tubershuckle population partway between impressive sucking power and a softer, gentler touch.

Two Tubershuckles engrossed in a tender moment

An excited male Tubershuckle accidentally devours his potential mate

A Tubershuckle lies dead, the unfortunate victim of a childish prank

We must constantly remind ourselves that nature is fragile to our influence. All too often we see the impacts of human activity on the life that sustains us and that consumes our poo. This unfortunate Tubershuckle has fallen prey to a childish prank. With a cork stuck in its feeding tube and no opposable thumbs, it is doomed to slowly dry out and return to the earth. Please, educate your children on the right way to treat Tubershuckles, and indeed, all of nature.